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What’s next? Locusts? Bush growing a brain?

Yeah, I have not posted. Shut it. It’s been a busy week. I have shipped the mother off to the Burgh for my Gram’s 90th birthday party. We were not able to make it but I did send pretty flowers. Does that count? At all?

Yeah, shut up.

Anyways, here is some good news. Got our taxes done. We are getting enough back to pay the insurance nightmare shortfall. Thank you Jeebus. However, it’s not enough for me to retire and just sit and pick stuff out of my belly button. Crap.

More good news: We are 7 payments away from freedom from CTA. Oh glorious day! Now hurry up.

Really not much to report other than the blessed solitude of the Momenator being gone, the rampant ODS (that’s Open Door Sex for those of you not in the know) that will be had, the lack of cooking that will be done. I did make a new friend though. I have dubbed her Hanoi Jane. We won’t go into why. I’ll explain later though. She’s big fun other than her communist tendencies. For now, I’ll protect her anonymity. I will out her ass at some point though, never you fear.

Dutifully took my walk on my break today despite there being a storm from hell last night and it looking like, at any moment, it may let loose again. Oh, and WTF? The Northshore (across Lake Pontchartrain) is set to possibly get flurries.

Of snow.

No, I’m sorry. If I have to live in this nightmarish state, deal with the ignorance, be in danger of my life just by going to the grocery, learn to speak in ebonics in order to just complete any order at a drive through, pay triple homeowner’s insurance, then I flat out refuse to have snow that close in proximity. Them’s the breaks weather. Now move on. Go somehwere north.

Sigh. I have to bake some stuff tonight for a church dealio that I am not even attending. I’m not sure why exactly that’s fucked up but somehow it seems to be. Jane is going to join me and help out. She won’t let me lick the spoon though. Whore. Selfish selfish whore.

Yeah, I’m this boring. Still. Sigh. I promise to have more interesting news at some point. Maybe my purse will get snatched at the grocery tomorrow and I’ll have oodles to write about.

Now I gotta go knock wood and toss salt over my shoulder. Damn it.

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4 Responses

  1. I don’t want to hear about how crazy your weather is sister. It was in the 70’s here one day and snowing the next. Texas is a mess. That Jane, she’s a demanding friend. Send some of those extra brownies my way.

  2. “Open Door Sex”! That’s awesome. I get that all the time. Oops! Was that mean to brag like that?

  3. Happy Birthday to your Gram! I love old people!
    ODS is da best!
    Snow… I want some snow dammit. EVERYBODY has snow but me. Hawaii will fucking get snow before I do. Oops I said fuck.
    You are an awesome baker that is why the church picked you.
    I heart you hooker

  4. I totally would have licked the spoon. You just gave into peer pressure. Do we need an after school special on the dangers of that?

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